Maybe because I am my own worst enemy that I often feel a deep sting when I'm on the receiving end of condemnation in my parenting walk. And I have seen the damage it does. From the new mom still learning to the seasoned mom that felt she should have known better.
For the majority of us moms, we do all we can and are all we know to be. We belong to MOPS, MIT and other play groups. We had a collection of books from Raising up Boys to Managers of our Homes. Our days are filled with one decision after another that carosels around our kiddos. And we all lay down at the end of the day tired and replaying moments of our day that we wish weren't going down in the record book. We all have bad moments, make less than stellar choices, have meltdowns and wish we could push the "do-over" button. Let us offer as much grace to other moms as the Lord offers to us. He comforts us as we share our tears and dissapointments. Let us offer encouragement and a kind word to that mother that has the crying child in the grocery store or the one playing limp noodle so he cannot be picked up and carried to the car graciously.
We do not know all that the Lord plans for us. We might have some amazing kids. Today. But there are no guarantees. We may have some really challenging kids. Today. But the Lord is faithful to finish a good work. I have seen faithful families produce unfaithful children. Amazing children from the spawn hellion. And a mix of the good, bad and ugly all from one family.
When we are tempted to think we are doing something so right that others should glean from our wisdom and take notes, let us remember that satan tries to destroy some of us by way of increase (Matthew 13:22). And when we are tempted to think are so failing at this parenting thing and everyone else does it better, let us remember that satan tries to destroy some of us by way of decrease (Luke 13:16). If we've had a bad week, we need the encouragment and if we've had a great day, reach out to another mom that we know needs that overflow from you.
Do I have one very difficult child because it was a surprise to the Lord? No. He knew the very DNA to this little redheaded spitfire before I knew he existed. The Lord knew I had it in me even if that requires some growing on my part. Going thru the fire refines. The Lord also knew that I have it in me that if I had all compliant wonderful easy children, that I would probably go around gloating at my skills and asking if anyone wanted my autograph.
The next time we are tempted to judge and disgrace another momma, remember that she is just as tired, just as worn, just as desperate to make good choices for her brood as we are. We do not know all that goes on behind a single status update and behind closed doors.
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