Blessings

I am finally getting to go to the grocery store today. Since we own our own business when things slow down, we still have to pay the business rent, the business truck, the business phone, order materials for jobs we have in the future that we haven't been paid for yet.....it's tiring and trying this time of the year when things slow down.

Blessing #1: In the past 6 weeks, I have only went for milk and one $30 trip for bare basics. However, God has completely provided our pantry just yesterday looked really bare. 2 weeks ago I looked in my flour jar and there looked to be about 1 cup of flour left and there still is today. We've been out of several items but the frig and freezers look like we haven't used hardly anything. And we've been eating fine, ask my scale. Last night I used the last of our potatoes for hashbrowns, hushpuppies, had deer steak and homemade bread and sliced fresh tomatoes that Allen's mom had dropped off green a couple of weeks ago. Gabby didn't even know that it was a concern of when I'ld be getting groceries and it was her night to pray, she prayed in thanks for the great food and then added, "and I pray that it fills us up and keeps our bodies healthy." There was plenty on the table, so I got a little teary. I hadn't thought of praying that the food would stretch and fill up, I had just been praying Allen would be paid for several jobs so we could go to the store and pay some bills.

Blessing #2: Dana stopped by with an extra gallon of milk she had been blessed with and was afraid it would expire before they could finish it. Thank you!

Blessing #3: Leanne stopped by with a coffee grinder...I had been wanting one to grind out some wheat that Wendy gave me. So I made another loaf of homemade bread with some freshly ground wheat mixed it and it was the perfect loaf. Delicious.

Blessing #4: Wendy felt sorry for us and gave us a box of goodies out of her pantry a couple of weeks ago. For some reason I just left the box in tact and thought I would only take out what I needed. I took out 2 bags of popcorn as the kids were really eyeing those. Then another friend of ours expressed that they were struggling. I was able to pass the box onto her and bless her with knowing that God will always provide for us.

Blessing #5: a friend stopped by and had taken advantage of the sale at Walgreens and dropped off some baby food the day after I had used my last jar for Wyatt. I have several foods for him frozen that I've made, but all vegetables.

Blessing #6: Walgreen had a sale: Buy $20 (certain items) get an instore credit of $12. I bought 20 2-packs of baby food for $1 each = $20, got $12 instore credit and I had coupons, so the baby food only cost me $3. Then I used the instore credit for some medicine we were needing.

God is good and faithful to provide for our needs. He also provides for our wants at times if he can trust us with them. As we have fallen behind on our house payment, at 1st that fear of what if we lose the house set in? But as I prayed for peace and started joyfully praising HIM for HIS plans I asked. Worst case? We lose the house. We lose our equity. Then what? We still have our family, God will provide the amount of money Allen can handle and the lifestyle that He wants us to have. We rent a house, make it our home, pray for more direction, suck up our pride, stand on the promise that God has our best in mind with HIS plans.

Buckle up, or else!

The other day we were out running errands and I looked in the rear view mirror to see that Gabby and Brian had unbuckled their car seats. I asked, "Is everyone buckled up?" "YES!" of course was the answer. So I turned down a side street and by no means was going fast, but felt the sudden urge to stop. Abruptly. They both stopped when they hit the seats in front of them. I apologized with as much compassion and sympathy as crazy women could muster without laughing.

Finally some stories about Makensie

Usually all the funny and silly little things that happen around here are thanks to Gabby smarting off or Brian exercising his boyish tendencies, while Makensie is my sugar and spice. She is either quietly stirring up strife or being the other momma and caring for Wyatt and her babies, helping me cook and just chatting along with me.

Tuesday night we had a girls night out just her and I. We went to a mom and daughter Mary Kay facial and then afterwards we shared a coke float at A&W. I enjoyed asking her question after question about what she enjoys, her dreams, her wants. She is so precious, while the other kids would list a page of toys she hopes to go to Africa to work with the poor someday. She is so sweet. How can she be the same one who drives me to the edge of madness sometimes with her talking back and rebellion?

Yesterday we handed out candy to the kids walking downtown and have plenty left over, guess what everyone's getting for Christmas? So before we started we had a little talk to just give 1 bar or peice to each kid walking by to make sure everyone got one. So our 1st visitors were some friends of ours. Makensie put one piece in her bag and then the little girl asked for a different kind that she liked better and took one. Makensie very politely said, "That is fine, but can I get that other peice back then?" I made sure to step in and let her know that was fine.

When we were all sitting outside handing out and greeting the trick-or-treaters, Makensie had went in the shop to use the restroom, and after several minutes comes running out dripping of water. "Somethings happened in the bathroom, I just barely touched it." I took off running as fast as a heavy girl can and looked in to see water spraying up to the ceiling. After turning off the water valve I realized that she had tried to use the squirt hose beside the sink and the sprayer part came off. So the bathroom was flooded. Poor baby, she is always the one things like this happen to.

Finally as we took the kids for their turn to trick or treat, a friend of mine gave them each a homemade sugar cookie cut and decorated like pumpkins, very cute. Makensie had eaten half of hers and then when we got in the van offered the remainder to Allen. I thought...Ok....Thanks! He said, "Thank you Makensie, that was really yummy." I told her, "And very thoughtful to share with daddy." She said sweetly, "Yeah, I dropped it on the way to the car and it landed icing side down and didn't want it." I burst out laughing of course and was quite grateful she didn't offer it to me.

BOO! Happy Halloween

Happy Halloween everyone.

This seems to be a controversial topic to some and this is the last year I'm not going to decorate for this holiday. I always enjoyed it growing up and my kids love all the decorations and I've been nervous that someone would think we weren't really Christians if we celebrated Halloween. We live in a very conservative God fearing little community, which is great, I love LOVE it here. However, it just sometimes feels like others convictions are pushed to become everyone's convictions.

When we went to my folks for a visit 2 weekends ago, my mom was dressed like a witch, the house was all decorated and on the table was this amazing spread of all kinds of fun treats for a little party. The kids and us were so excited. She had little pigs in the blanket that looked like bugs, a dragon sandwich, green deviled eggs with mouse droppings, bubbling punch, and dozens of others, I'll post a picture.

The kids giggle (more like sceam...MOM....LOOK!LOOK!...MOOOOOMMMM....DID YOU SEEE THEIR HOUSE?!!) with excitement each time we pass someplace that is decorated.

I'm not quite sure I understand why there is such an issue about it. There are several church's tonight having a Harvest Festival, the kids can dress up and get candy. However, I prefer the good ol knocking on doors (familiar ones) and trick or treating. So what is the old saying? A rose by any other name is still a rose? My kids and I are not worshiping evil, they are dressing up and getting candy. I know the Holiday stems from what used to be evil, but wasn't everyone dressing up to scare off the demons? Christ was not born on December 25th and yet Christmas as we celebrate HIS birth was assigned to this date because the other pagan festivals at that time. And a lot of the traditions we include, the greenery, the yule log, the lights, charity all came from those pagan celebrations, yet we Christians have ok'd them as long as we put a godly spin on our views. Now I'm not saying that we view Halloween as godly, but we do NOT view it as evil. My kids dress up weekly and look forward to boundless candy and tummy aches tonight.

I wish I would have went ahead and decorated, I don't have anything really scary, just some spider webs, some wall decorations and some cute little witches that sit on the front porch. However Brian keeps asking if he can get this little man at Walgreens that pulls his head off. Boys!

We are going down to decorate in Allen's shop today. He moved his shop to the downtown area and they always have a parade of kids going thru there. I found out this week that we need to have enough candy for 1200-1500 kids. WOW. That's a lot of candy. The checker at WalMart asked if we had a lot of trick or treaters. "nope, just like sweets." Although it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. All the candy and groceries this week was less than $170. And I even picked up several bags of the bite size candy bar mixes. It should be fun to see all the kids dressed up. I'm not so sure how excited the kids are going to be after having to hand out for a while versus them walking around to the other shops to get treats themselves.

Humbleness

“Most of the sins we do not commit are not because of our virtue, but because we lack the energy or opportunity” Eugene Peterson

We will never understand ourselves as the fallen humans we are until we understand that there is no sin we are incapable of committing.

And We Think the Laws are Harsh Now?

I have often wondered if we as a society are just too lenient on those who break that law. I know that everyone makes mistakes, after all I do own a mirror. But I'm talking about clearly understand and purposely chosen to ignore laws. Drinking and driving for instance. I know someone who was pulled over, had their child in the vehicle with them, ended up getting a ticket, the wife drove home, the husband had to shell out a couple hundred dollars for a lawyer and was done with it. Or what about the 3rd strike your out theory of law? Are we playing a game or are we looking to punish the criminal.


Yes I am conservative. I still believe in the Bible and it's teaching and ways of life. And I do believe that our country has gotten too concerned about being politically correct to not offend the 20% of individuals that are screaming louder that the 80% that say they are Christians in this country.


Have you read Deuteronomy 19-20 lately? And sometimes we worry about being too harsh with our laws. These chapters are not about killing, but about protecting the innocent and while you are reading about protecting the innocent you see that those who did shed innocent blood were handed over to those who wanted justice and were killed. If you falsely testified, you were too. Even when going to war against those cities that had turned their back on God, He commanded that the only living thing to be left would be the fruit trees so that the soldiers find nourishment. Doesn't seem like He was concerned that He might offend someone or become unpopular or was thinking, "oh, it's OK, they were just young, let's give them 2 more chances." No. He said to take the strictest punishment so that others might see and not want to follow in those ways.

After I thought about our current judicial system, I thought about my own system in my home. Don't worry, I'm not planning on stoning any of my kiddos. But when I give them 3 chances and they know they get 3 chances, guess how many they try to take? Yep, 3 chances! So if a little 4 year old has figured this out, isn't it only reasonable to think that the adults have also? I realize these are old testament scriptures and that Jesus taught we are to love and forgive, but He also was not a wimpy man. It all starts in the home. If I allow my children to slide by with several chances then punish them with the same punishment as if it were a 1st time offense I am breeding them to disobey until I'm at my wits end. And they will grow into adults who will do the same, and into citizens, coworkers, spouses...

A group of our recently finished "Shepherding a Child's Heart", good book. A little more compassionate than "To Train up a Child", but along the same lines. If our children to do obey us, willingly the 1st time, how will they learn to obey God willingly the first time as they age without going through a lot of unneccessary hurt and correction from God? I'm recognizing things that I hadn't before and yes, it seems discouraging at times when I'm spending so much time training, correcting, praying to these little moldable creatures. Then there comes proof that they are learning and growing in Him and His ways and makes it all worth while.

Lord give me discernment and energy to nip problems as they arise rather than to let them grow. Give me wisdom to mold their hearts not just offer correction. Use me Lord to raise them so that they will ultimately glorify You when they are serving you.

It's a Brand New Day

So Allen and I had a little throw down Sunday morning. Typical Griffin style for us, usually means confrontation is not good. He gets defensive and wants to walk out to avoid fighting and I follow after him in the little yipping dog fashion until he is literally driving out of the drive way leaving me yelling at no one, causing strangers walking by to pick up their pace and the neighbors across the street to shut their blinds after having evidence to put me away for my complete insanity.

However this Sunday was different. I said in peace and calm frustration some concerns that were bothering me and then when he left the house I retreated to cry in the shower. I still felt like I had blown it. I was very tired from working on the taxes, which I finally did complete. Plus we had the added emotion of showing the house after the kids had fended for themselves all week, leaving a trail of destuction.

Normally our disputes cause us to go three grades down on the successful marriage scale, then spend 2 weeks in quiet and then act as if nothing was ever said to begin with and go back to our happy is we lifestyle. Probably that's why no one has ever called for us to speak at a marriage conference or be the poster couple for good communication.

I realized that I am called to be submissive, the home is my responsibility, I'm not promised happiness here and I am called to do all this work unto God.

I had some heart to heart time with God yesterday too and was crying on my knees and wondering if God didn't value us as women, at least not as much as men if we are to submit to them and then this is how we are treated. Does HE really care about me, a woman? About my feelings? Why would HE create such a desire to be loved and yet put me with someone who has RCD and is not very good at expressing it? Should we are women even view ourselves as disciples of HIM or are we just to go through life quiet and serving our husbands and families? I had a difficult time at first with all those questions, confusion, lies from satan...until I finally quieted and listened, took my eyes off me and put my heart back on HIM. I told HIM of my trust in HIM, of my love for HIM, regardless of my life, regardless of my happiness. That this is all training for my character and for HIS will to be the outcome. I felt peaceful, and then I felt it pressed on my heart, "that if Allen completely fills the void in my heart, then I will lose my deepest need that HE fills in me."

I went to the homeschool moms night out last night (Tina taught how she cooks for 4 months at a time in 2 days...pretty impressive! And I'll post more on this one later) anyhow, when I got home, Allen had the kids bathed and in bed (very unusual from his typical job around the house which is to mow and keep the tv buttons warm), the house was picked up, supper put away and candles lit through the house and THE cd from our wedding was playing. I didn't know he even knew we had a cd. And he offered a heart felt apology for being, "a jerk" in his own words.

I was so surprised and thankful. I think this is the 1st time he has been the one to apology for his actions. He opened up and told me how much he appreciated everything I do and everything I am. It meant so much.

I can think of no other difference this time other than prayer surrounding him to soften, and me to have the strength to not lip off. I feel like this is the first argument that we've had in which the outcome actually made our marriage stronger rather than putting up 3 steps back and then working the next 6 months to get to where we were before the fight.

A friend pointed this out and it seems irresponsible of me to just now realize this after almost 10 years, however, his defensiveness probably stems from his childhood and never being able to do enough to please his dad, rather than him just being inconsiderate.

I just wanted to share with you, not necessarily anything earth shattering, but it is wonderful all the same. God showed me HIS love today through my husband. Even if this is the only time in our marriage, it was more than just Allen reaching out and loving me, it was God loving me through him. I agree with my friend Amy, that there are many times that I am so thankful that I do not have to be the leader and have all that pressure on my shoulders.

There are several of us ladies getting ready to start a book/bible study on Created to Be His Helpmeet. I have done the study before and this is NOT a feel good marriage book, this woman can be brutal and lacks a bit of compassion, but this is the marriage book that makes all overs seem like fluff. I'm anxious to go through it a 2nd time. Practice makes...well...better anyway.